It is April and April Fools has only just begun. Well, or so Matt Velic (blog | twitter) would have us believe.
Matt decided that this month for TSQL Tuesday, he would pull out all stops to help us break out the inner prankster in ourselves.
You can read all about it from his invitation here.
Reading the invitation made me immediately flash to a couple of recent possibilities or things that maybe others had done.
For instance, I thought about the April Fools post I did about Backups in SQL 2014. Mix a little truth and a splash of fun and you have a believable April Fools blog post. You can read that post here.
Then I thought momentarily on a great post by Paul Randal for April Fools. Paul talked about a great prank that could be pulled on some co-workers and it would really get them in a frenzy. You could read about his Day 0 checksum issue here.
Then I flashed to something a friend tried to pull on me. He sent me a script to the following tune.
SELECT 'principal name' = p.NAME ,
'principal creation date' = p.create_date ,
'password' = ca.passwordcrack ,
'instance sid' = p.sid,
'user type' = p.type
FROM master.sys.server_principals p
CROSS APPLY ( SELECT p1.principal_id ,
CAST(0x596F75207468696E6B2070617373776F726473206172652074686174206561737920746F206465637279707420696E2053514C205365727665723F2E2E2E417072696C20466F6F6C277321 AS VARCHAR(1023))
+ ISNULL(CONVERT(VARCHAR(10), NULLIF(POWER(p1.principal_id,
0), 1)), ' ')
FROM sys.server_principals p1
) ca ( principal_id, passwordcrack )
WHERE p.type LIKE '[GUS]'
AND ca.principal_id = p.principal_id
For the seasoned DBA, the joke in this one is easy to spot. But it will still catch some people and it could provide a good laugh.
But my favorite piece of seriousness to parley in the workplace comes from this gem.
This gem from our friends at ThinkGeek®, can provide several minutes of hard laughter. You plug this into an USB port that is not very visible and then camp out and watch for the fun to begin. If they are typing in SSMS, you could end up with some real fun (random key strokes inserted into keywords etc).
Whatever you do, please do not attempt this with somebody who will be connecting to a Production instance.
Managing concurrency is one of the most challenging aspects of working with any enterprise DBMS. There is much confusion out there about locking, blocking, and deadlocks. In this demo heavy session we will clear up the confusion.
Randy Knight, MCM, is an IT professional who has worked with Microsoft technology for over 20 years, focusing on SQL Server for the last 16. He has worked in a variety of settings, including 6 years as a Database Architect for Match.com, one of the largest and most successful dot-coms. He is currently the President and Principal Consultant for SQL Server Solutions Group LLC, a Utah-based SQL Server consultancy.
Meeting ID: 9KSDPD
This is really late notice. We had some extenuating circumstances this month and then a last minute cancellation. Now that everything is squared away, we have some great news.
If you are in the Las Vegas area, you are welcome to attend our monthly meeting which is now being held at the south end of the strip. This should put you a bit out of the way of the CES 2014 crowds – though you will probably have a fantastic time getting through the crowd.
Then again, maybe you just can’t peel yourself away from these types of things at CES.
Or maybe you are just too busy trying to find the right pair of speakers for your car at CES 2014.
Well good news! S3OLV holds the meetings in the evening and the main show at CES should be pretty close to wrapping up.
Come join us this month for a presentation by Julie Koesmarno. She hails from down under and is making time in her schedule last minute to help us out. You can read all about the presentation and Julie at our Meetup site here.
Guess what else you can do by visiting our Meetup site. You can find out about how we have changed venues to the South end of the Strip. That’s right, S3OLV has moved. We are now meeting at the Tahiti Village. Details of the location are in the meetup. Check it out.
Oh, and don’t forget. We still offer an online virtual meeting space for the user group just in case you can’t make it in person. Details for joining the virtual meeting are also in the Meetup page.
This is the eighth installment in the 12 day series for SQL tidbits during this holiday season.
Previous articles in this mini-series on quick tidbits:
- SQL Sat LV announcement
- Burning Time
- Reviewing Peers
- Broken Broker
- Peer Identity
- Lost in Space
- Command ‘n Conquer
As tradition would have it, this is the first day of the new year. This is the first day of 11111011110.
As tradition would also have it, the New Year also means that there was plenty of partying and reveling throughout the night leading up to and beyond the stroke of midnight. One such party was reported as having the largest fireworks show in history. Seeing some of the video and pictures – it was a spectacular show. Check it here.
If you are interested in some of the other worldwide events, here is a pretty good slideshow of some of those parties too.
Another tradition that comes with New Year’s day is the quarterly announcement for MVP renewals (or newals) from Microsoft. If you happen to know somebody that was recently announced has being an MVP for the next year – tell them thanks.